It feels like the first day of our likely to be fatally fleeting taste of fall. Something in this cool air and stiff breeze has got me thirsty, so I’m headed down to one of the newest purveyors of potent potables in town: Two Headed Dog. They’re situated at Elgin and Fannin in Midtown in an alley behind the Verizon store. Yes, an alley. The home of all the really good dive bars.
If you’re a fan of Grand Prize, and I definitely am, this is the place for you. In fact, Two Headed Dog was opened by a pair of Grand Prize’s former bartenders, Lindsay Rae and Billy Boyd. Their influence shows in the old-fashioned poolhall-chic decor, the tables built from Fitzgerald’s-salvaged ship lap (RIP old friend), and the bathroom walls plastered in classic Playboy porn. Seriously; 70’s bush and all. The interior bar area is small and cozy with enough space for about 30 people, but there’s also a large patio equipped with picnic tables and lawn chairs and creepy gnome statues aplenty. If that’s not got your attention, I don’t know what will. The drinks? Yeah, I guess this is a blog about getting smashed on the cheap. Let’s talk drinks.
Two Headed Dog packs an extensive bar into such a small space and it’s made efficient through clever prep-work. Various cocktails are kept on draft or frozen in the machines. Complicated preparations are handled behind the scenes before the bar is open. That means booze can be applied directly to your face that much faster! I was most interested in the draft cocktails, so I tried a couple with the intent to sip and then pass to a friend. I ended up accidentally the whole both of them instead.
- Aloe There is a twist on a margarita with, well, added aloe. It’s the just the sort of light, refreshing drink you want during Houston’s scorching summers. I give it a 3/4.
- The Blood of My Enemies is a tropical, vaguely tiki concoction made with “citrus wizard stuff”. Whatever a citrus wizard stuff is, it’s tasty. 3/4 here as well.
I also took advantage of their happy hour with a $6 old fashioned (not too sweet, made with lemon) and then a $5 boilermaker (Stolen X and a Montucky Cold Snack). Then a regular bought me a fernet (like Listerine and Jäger had an even uglier baby — it’s gross and I love it). At this point, I was far too toasted to try one of their $3 wells, but I bet they’re both boozy and effective for their primary function of social lubrication.